Hannah Haught’s 10 worst movies of 2017

by Hannah Haught, Co-Editor-In-Chief

This was a year filled with wonderful and interesting films that left me feeling both happy and inspired. Some movies, though, left me feeling nothing but annoyed. Here are ten movies from this year that aren’t worth a watch.

10. Despicable Me 3Despicable Me 3 wasn’t bad, but it certainly wasn’t good. The movie franchise started out strong with the first movie being both touching and humorous. The second and third installments just seem unnecessary as the story had been wrapped up so well in the first. The movie uses a cliche twist of Gru having a twin brother which felt a bit dumb and only a means of forcing a new plot line. This film also included an overwhelming number of minions, making them more of a staple than a funny side element. I did enjoy seeing Lucy’s relationship with the girls grow, and all of the voice actors gave good performances, but the movie as a whole was just mediocre.

9. Smurfs: The Lost Village – Similar to Despicable Me 3, Smurfs: The Lost Village wasn’t horrible, it was just okay. I still don’t fully comprehend why we need so many smurfs movies, but The Lost Village does take a step in the right direction by being entirely animated rather than half live action. Overall, the plot is predictable and the film itself is boring, but there’s nothing awful, just lackluster.

8. Everything, Everything – Going into this movie, I was already biased as I had not enjoyed the book at all. I gave the film the benefit of the doubt though, hoping it would fix the issues the novel had with its cliche protagonists and poor romance. The movie surprised me by turning both of these elements up by 100. Every single part of this film was cheesy, and not in a good way. The romance was not believable, I had no sympathy towards the main character, and as with the book, the ending was lazy and frustrating. There was not a second that I found it plausible that the main character would risk her life to be with the male protagonist as there was no chemistry at all between them. If you’re watching this movie expecting a great romance or strong narrative, then get ready to be disappointed.

7. Ghost in the Shell – Adapting an anime into a movie is already a bad idea, doing so with a white cast is a worse idea, and putting little to no effort into preserving what made the original so good is the worst idea. Ghost in the Shell takes a good concept and completely overshadows it with stereotypical action scenes, making it seem no different from any other hero movie, except there’s no heart behind this one. Don’t let the high budget and star studded cast fool you, Ghost in the Shell is a shell of a movie.

6. The Boss Baby – Dreamworks seems to have a trend of only putting out wonderful or horrible movies. Unfortunately, The Boss Baby falls more on the horrible side. The animation is fine, and the character design is okay, but the movie is just so hard to sit through. The childish humor and deep voice of the baby in the film had me rolling my eyes rather than laughing. None of the jokes hit, and the film seemed to drag on forever. I also found myself confused as to whether the events in the movie were actually happening or if they were all just in the main character’s head. I’m sure if I gave it another watch I could figure it out, but a movie for children shouldn’t be this confusing, and I certainly do not want to suffer through this film an additional time.

5. Wish Upon – When I first heard about the poor reviews that Wish Upon received I was perplexed as the trailer had looked so good and the concept had been so intriguing. I believe where Wish Upon made its mistake was combining the new and interesting concept of the film with typical cheesy horror movie tropes. The idea was good, but the execution was poor. It was so poor, in fact, that the movie was hard to watch and I was either rolling my eyes or cringing throughout the whole thing. Quality horror movies are hard to come by, and Wish Upon certainly isn’t one of them.

4. Happy Death Day – From the name to the script, this movie, to put it bluntly, is just plain dumb. The narrative was weak; the baby masked murderer was hard to take seriously; and the film simply redid a trope that has been attempted time and time again. There are a multitude of stories that center around the main character repeating the same day, and this movie adds nothing to that category. The best thing I can say for this movie is that it’s easy to make fun of, and that was the only enjoyment I could really derive from it.

3. Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul – When Diary of a Wimpy Kid was adapted from book to film in 2010, it resulted in a movie that took a simple middle schooler’s thoughts and expanded them into an extremely entertaining, and surprisingly touching, narrative. The two sequels that followed suit were equally wonderfully silly, but for the fourth a new cast was needed to replace the now adult cast. A recast doesn’t always have to result in problems, sometimes fresh faces actually end up adding more to character, but in this film that was not the case. The acting was lackluster, and the chemistry between the cast was so bad that it was hard to suspend my belief and see them as the family they were playing. There was no heart behind this film, and the allusions to the books felt forced and out of place. I greatly enjoy the Wimpy Kid movies, but this film is definitely not one that I will rewatch.

2. Death Note – Adapted from the widely popular anime of the same title, 2017’s Death Note tells a new twist on the story of a notebook with the power to kill. This Death Note takes place in Seattle rather than Japan, and makes slight changes to the original plot. Aside from the white-washed cast and the film attempting to cram a 37 episode show into 100 minutes, the whole thing just comes off as tacky and lacks the suspense and concepts of morality that made the anime so great. There was not a second of the movie in which I believed that Light could outsmart anyone at all, removing the intellectual battle between him and L that acted as the backbone for the show’s entire run. If the movie had attempted to actually showcase a new story rather than holding onto the old one and making it worse, then I believe it would’ve been much stronger.

1. The Emoji Movie – With its unoriginal plot, forgettable characters, and overall lack of, well, emotion, the emoji movie is easily the worst movie of 2017. The entire film came off as more of an advertisement for outdated apps than a narrative causing it to be extremely weak. The jokes in this movie don’t work, the messages don’t stick, and throughout the whole duration of the film I found myself wanting to get up and leave. It’s not even bad in a humorous way, it’s just plain bad. If you’re planning on watching the movie only to poke fun at it, then don’t, it’s frankly just a waste of time.