When my parents spent countless nights filling out paperwork, visited adoption agencies for hours on end, and took me on a month-long trip to China in an attempt to adopt my sister, I asked myself what any logical 6-year old would ask himself: Why are we adopting? This is too much work.

From the moment I held 1-year-old Lilly in my arms the first time, my question was answered: It changes countless lives. Most important, it has changed mine.

My family adopted Lillian Xin-Qing (pronounced sin-sing) Hart from the Jianxi Province in Eastern China. Although my parents had been able to have a biological child (me, of course), they had always dreamt of adopting a child to give them a better life than they could have had.

In honor of National Adoption Month, I decided to sit down with teenager Lilly to talk about her perception of adoption, what it has meant to her, and how she feels about our family.

I recorded this interview on the StoryCorps app. Story Corps is a non-profit organization whose database is used by millions of people across the country to preserve the people’s most important stories.

Me: Does the fact that you are adopted still affect you? Do you ever think about how crazy it is sometimes?

Lilly: Yes. I think sometimes about how crazy it is that I ended up with the family that I have today.

Me: Have you ever wondered what life would be like if we (our family) didn’t adopt you?

Lilly: I’ve thought about it before, and it’s weird because I don’t know who I would have ended up with or if I would have ended up with anyone at all.

Me: Do you ever want to go back to China?

Lilly: I definitely want to visit and go back to China, especially where I am from. I don’t rememeber anything at all. I think it would be really cool to go back.

Me: What have they told you about when you were adopted?

Lilly: They said that they were there for two weeks and that it took a long time to get through all of the paperwork since it was in Mandarin, and then they took me home and apparently I was really bad on the flight back.

Me: Yes you were super naughty! One of the moments I will remember for the rest of my life is seeing you for the first time. It was one of those moments that I will never forget. If you were to go back to China, what would you do?

Lilly: I would go back to where I came from and explore Chinese culture because I don’t know much about it.

Me: Have you ever felt different around our extended family?

Lilly: Well, we are family, and they treat me no different than they treat you. I don’t feel adopted or different ever when I’m around them.

Me: For any families that are thinking about adopting, what would you tell them?

Lilly: I think it is really cool because you’re giving a child from another part of the world a better lifestyle than they would have had, and it is amazing.

Me: What would you tell other adopted kids about your experience?

Lilly: I think that I was really fortunate to have a welcoming and including experience, and that you should not be ashamed to be adopted. Whether you are your parents’ biological kid or not, it doesn’t matter because you are family no matter what.